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What do I love about: Big Potential?
From my detailed notes below, you can infer that I really enjoyed this book. The writer forces the reader to re-evaluate most of what they know about big potential. While I must agree that the writer does in fact call out a lot of common themes, he does draw the reader’s attention to how we are wired and rewarded as humans to realize potential based on individuals success as opposed to big potential success that happens as a team.
What do I not love about: Big Potential?
For individuals who read a lot of self-development materials, the content can come along as obvious advice. But like the writer mentions in his conclusion, you cannot shower today and expect to still remain clean next year. We need to refresh our minds on these core principles and research based findings.
Who should read: Big Potential?
Individuals who are keen on personal development and leading regardless of their positions or levels within an organization.
Who should not read: Big Potential?
If self-development books do not pique your interest either because they never had or because you have read a decent number of them you may want to stay away.
Notes from Big Potential
Part I: The big problem with small potential
Chapter 1: The power of hidden connection
- SMALL POTENTIAL is the limited success you can achieve alone. BIG POTENTIAL is the success you can achieve only in a virtuous cycle with others.
- We spend the first 22 years of our life being judged and praised for our individual attributes and what we can achieve alone, when for the rest of our life, our success is almost entirely interconnected with that of others.
- I realize that while happiness is a choice, it is not just an individual choice, it is an interconnected one. This is because when you choose to act with gratitude or joy, you make joy and gratitude easier for others, who in turn give you more reasons to be grateful and joyous.
- The seed of big potential consist of 5 stages:
- SURROUND yourself with a star system of positive influencers.
- EXPAND your power by helping others lead from every seat.
- ENHANCE your resources by becoming a Prism of praise
- DEFEND the system against negative attacks
- SUSTAIN gains by fueling the Virtuous cycle
Chapter 2: Lifting the invisible ceiling of potential
- No matter how brilliant your mind or strategy, if you are playing a solo game, you will always lose to a team.
- Great things in business are never done by one person. They are done by a team of people. Individuals play the game, but teams beat the odds.
- Success at Google, just like at Harvard, is not about survival of the fittest, it is about survival of the best fit.
- If you became happier, any friend within a one-mile radius would be 63 percent more likely to also become happier. Connecting with high-potential people dramatically increases your likelihood of high-potential.
- Big potential like genius, creativity and inspiration is not something you have, it is something you tap into.
- We learn better when we teach others rather than study simply for the sake of individual knowledge. This is called Protégé effect. And it is a perfect example of how working to make others better actually increases your individual potential.
- Big potential is not about trying to go faster alone. It is about working to become better together.
- Big potential is about gaining a competitive edge not by limiting others success rates, but by raising them.
- When we pursue happiness, we are actually more likely to become more successful.
Part II: The seeds of big potential
Chapter 3: Surround yourselves with positive influence
The height of your potential is predicted by the people who surround you.
To build your constellation of stars require 3 strategies:
Strategy 1: Tap into the power of positive peer pressure
While conventional wisdom assumes that you work more hours when you work remotely (because there is no end to the day), new research has found that the marginal increase in productivity does not compare to the innovation, creativity, social connection, engagement, and company loyalty we pick up from our peers just by being in the same physical space.
Strategy 2: Create balance through variety
The more diverse your social support network, the more resilient you will be when life throws you a curveball. So we need to take a moment to mentally check the genetic makeup of our relationships. Are you surrounded only by people just like you- by people of the same race, gender, political beliefs, interests, and ambitions? If so you are limiting your potential and your growth.
3 types of people you should surround yourself
PILLARS: They are a rock for you in tough times. They have your back regardless. The loyal best friend who will drop everything to come over late at night
BRIDGES: Are connectors to new people or resources outside of your existing resource ecosystems. They are the people who will invite you to a club or committee.
EXTENDERS: Are positive influence who push you out of your comfort zone. It could be a mentor or a friend.
We have something to learn from everyone as long as we can learn to truly listen to and connect with them
Strategy 3: Create reciprocal bonds
- Reciprocal relationships tends to be more fruitful; the most successful leaders always look for ways to give more to their contacts
- Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
- Everyone needs a moment of solitude, but true meaning, success and happiness are impossible unless we are connected to others
Chapter 4: Expand your power- Leading from every seat
Strategy 1: Lead from the eleventh chair
Recognize that you can create change wherever you are
Strategy 2: Develop your elevated pitch
A pitch in which you convince people to be positive influences
Strategy 3: Use progress as fuel
To sustain change, we must reward and reinforce people’s efforts to create change
Strategy 4: Lead from every lunch seat
You can find a path to leadership in almost any job. But first you need a path to meaning
- Not only is leadership a choice, so is meaning
- If you are constantly looking for greener pastures you will never see the beauty of the one you are currently in.
- If your dreams does not scare you they are not big enough
Chapter 5: Enhance your resources
- Instead of praise Misers, we need to become praise Prisms.
- Your depression is connected to your refusal to praise
Strategy 1: Stop comparison praise
- When you tell someone else they are better than someone else,that by definition means that someone else is worse
- The easiest way to stop comparison praise is to remove superlatives from our vocabulary e.g the best, the fastest etc. Instead the inviolable law of praise for leaders and parents: Do not compliment at the expense of others. Try praising by saying for example “your report was amazing”.
Strategy 2: Spotlight the right
The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate
Strategy 3: Praise the base
- Small potential praise shines on one person already at the top, then flames out there. Big potential praise shines on the support system that made high performance praise possible
- Talent wins games, but teamwork and intelligence wins championships. Our praise should flow to the support players not just the superstars.
Strategy 4: Democratize praise
Gratitude is not only the greatest virtues but the parent of all the other
Strategy 5: Unlock the hidden 31
The people who have the power are the people most expressive of their mindset, positive, or negative. The problem is that most systems have this huge class of people-31 percent who are engaged and positive but are not expressing it, which means that the social script is largely being written by the vocal negative individuals
Strategy 6: Don’t just praise the outcome, praise to an outcome
Chapter 6: Defend against negative influences
- Contrary to what many people believe emotions like sadness, fear and anger do not obstruct the path to big potential. To the contrary, they are necessary and useful. I say in my talks that the opposite of happiness is not unhappiness. Unhappiness can fuel positive change. Unhappiness reminds me when I am lonely and need to reach to friends, unhappiness tells me when I am doing something that goes against my core values and unhappiness tells me when my work is not in line with my priorities.
- FEAR, SADNESS & ANGER are crucial. They become problematic only when they become imbalanced- when our fear tips into paralysis, when our anger tips into rage, when our sadness tips into despair. The key is to DEFEND ourselves against the forces that conspire to push us over the edge.
- Observing someone who is stressed especially a coworker or family can have an immediate effect upon our own nervous systems, raising our levels of stress hormone cortisol by as much as 26 percent.
- You do not even have to see or hear someone to pick up their stress, you can also smell it. New research shows that stress produces specific hormones that are released when we sweat. And the human olfactory system can not only pick up on them but even detect whether these hormones were the result of low stress or high stress. By being surrounded by only negative and stressed out people very quickly tips our balance from motivated and positive to frazzled and negative.
- Roughly 90% of anxiety at work is created by 5% of one’s network- the people who sap energy. And Harvard business school research shows that a single toxic person has a much greater impact than a superstar on a team.
Strategy 1: Build a moat
- Individuals who watched just 3 minutes of negative news in the morning were 27% more likely to report their day as unhappy 6-8 hours later.
- Habits are formed and broken through action.
Strategy 2: Build a mental stronghold
- Try not to start your phone call with “I am so swamped” or “what a week” or “is it Friday yet’. Instead start with a breath of fresh air and say It is great to talk to you”, or “I am so excited about our work together”.
- Stress is a credit card for energy. You are going to pay it back but with interest. The corollary is mindfulness is a credit card for resilience; the more you spend, the more rewards you get at the end of the month.
Strategy 3: Learn the art of mental aikido
- We stress about things only when we care about them. So if you notice yourself beginning to stress about something, ask yourself “why does this matter”.
- Instead of describing your work responsibilities as annoying, frustrating, or overwhelming, talk about the opportunities they provide to build new relationships, learn new things, and raise your potential.
Strategy 4: Take a vacation from your problems
The greatest competitive advantage in the modern economy is a positive and engaged brain
Strategy 5: Pick your battles
In work and life, when we repeatedly stumble and fall along a certain path, rather than dusting ourselves off, and trying again (and again), it might be time to ask if we are simply on the wrong path. Quitters sometime do win.
Chapter 7: Sustain the gains
- Big potential is about leveraging the power of others, and it is often easier for others to see meaning in our life than it is for us when we are in the thick of it.
- The 2 greatest motivators for achieving our goals are perception of progress and feeling like the finish line is close.
Conclusion
- You cannot shower once and hope to remain clean next year. You cannot exercise today hoping to never need to exercise again.
- CHANGE- like success like potential and like happiness-can’t be pursued alone. Because true change, big or small requires the support of champions who “get it”. It requires resilience. It requires leadership, no matter what sit we sit in. And it requires collective momentum. None of which can be possible without the ecosystem of potential.